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Where's My Joseph?
The dream I had last night went like this...
I was invisible and no one could see me. I was in a house and got caught in between two doors opening. When I did, there was a guy who bumped into me - of course he was confused because there was nothing there. I found him later and told him that he bumped into me. Then we were walking, and I began to pull the bodies of dead women out of wells full of mud. He was vomiting. I was trying to identify them. The only name I remember was "Star Jones" - 1/2 porn star, 1/2 common as dirt.
And then I woke up.
This dream followed a lecture I heard on John Eldredge's "Wild At Heart."
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/29/2004 09:11:25 AM | (2) comments
The Feminization Of Christianity
I read a very interesting book by Mary Stewart Van Leeuwen called "Fathers and Sons: The Search For The New Masculinity." In it, she talks about the changing face of Christianity in America. This is, in short, her assessment...
During the early American frontier days, men and women worked side by side to tame the wild. They did this out of necessity. It wasn't reasonable to have an able bodied person dusting trinkets in study, so women and men did hard labor. There was some division of labor, based usually around child care, but other than that, labor was labor and everyone helped.
Furthermore, children grew up with the prescence of both parents, being influenced by both parents and having role models for each sex.
Finally, men were considered the leader of the home - as proven in that child care booklets and pamphlets of the time were always addressed to the fathers, not mothers.
Then, the Industrial Revolution happened. Business was hard and traits associated with Christianity - such as love, mercy, patience - came into conflict with the reality in which most men lived. Thus, religion became more and more the sphere of the woman as men, in all honesty, were unable to live lives of internal tensions of value. As this trend continued though, men began to incorporate within themselves the values of the business world and thus Christianity was seen as "sissy." The lilly white paintings of a milk toast Jesus are the relics of these days.
Van Leeuwen tells the story of a professor at a Christian college who asked her to come speak to his class. Prior to the class she was to speak, the professor handed out a survey. The survey consisted of a list of personality characteristics and the students were required to choose whether the characteristic was more masculine or more feminine, in their opinion of course. The trick was, though, that he mixed the "fruits of the Spirit" into the list. The results were this -
All of the fruits of the Spirit were characterized as feminine - and when the professor broke down the results by sex, over 90% of the men said that ALL of the fruits of the Spirit were feminine!
Now I suppose there are many things to be said about all of this, and we can talk about it. But, I would like to suggest that it is the context that books like "Wild at Heart" are produced.
There's quite a lot to unpack there, but I want to suggest that Eldredge's book is so popular because he's speaking to a need that Christian men feel (at least a lot of them). They apparently feel like they're being feminized - or emasculated. The problem is that Eldredge wants to take values such as violence and ascribe it (1st) to men only and not women and then (2nd) to the Kingdom.
Not ok by me. And I'm sure he doesn't care who I am, but I'll tell you...it is NOT ok by me.
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/24/2004 03:28:47 PM | (0) comments
How Many Realities Does YOUR Brain Hold?
Dualism - a Greek philosophy which stated that reality was made up of opposites (see below post). Yet not only were there opposites, but they were ranked opposites, meaning that one member of the pair was always "better" in some way than the other. So that...
The Night is good and pure and moral
and
The Day is bad and evil and immoral.
What? You don't agree?
Well, of course not, because everyone knows that...
The Day is good
and
The Night is evil.
You can feel it, can't you? The sense that the world is back on kilter, now that I've "corrected" myself - now that I've told you what you "know" to be true. Do you see how you and I are influenced by dualism?
Of course if I asked you to defend the statement that "the period of time in a certain geographical location when solar light is not available is, in fact, an immoral time," you wouldn't even try. You would tell me, that of course night isn't immoral. What about Christmas night? What about the night your first child was born? These nights were not evil - no, no! Of course not!
But look how we carry our culture into the Bible - read Genesis 1. On the fourth day, God creates "a light to govern the day and a lesser light to govern the night." When you read of the "lesser light," you think "less in value" or "less important," don't you? You picture the great and glorious sun and the meeker, weaker, lesser moon, right?
That's because we are so influenced by dualism! The sun and the moon were a pair of opposites in dualistic philosophy - and the sun was greater (as in better) than the moon.
But that's not what the ancient Hebrews meant when they wrote Genesis 1. They simply meant that the moon wasn't as bright - didn't make as much light - the "lesser light"- that all. It wasn't a statement of value, it was a statement of fact.
There's no universal rule out there that says that things that make lots of light are more valuable than things that make less light. A raging forest fire versus a roaring fireplace? Ok, then.
Here's another pair the Greeks came up with - Man and Woman. And, as with most dualistic thought, the "Man / Woman Pair" was associated with other pairs, like this one: "Reason / Feeling" or this one "Head / Heart" or this one "Facts / Myths" or this one "Spiritual World / Physical World" or finally "Sun / Moon." Man was associated with Reason, Facts, The Spiritual World and The Sun. Woman, on the other hand, was associated with Feeling, Myths, The Physical World and the Moon.
Furthermore, as was common in dualism, there was a ranking or hierarchy in the comparison. You can see, of course, that our culture - as did the Greek culture - ranks those things associated with the Man as superior to those things associated with Woman.
You feel it too, don't you? I do. It feels right to say that the "Spiritual World" is superior to the "Physical World." "Facts" are clearly superior to "Myths."
But again, ask yourself to defend your "gut feelings."
John Milton wrote Paradise Lost - a great literary achievement - for sure. Of course, it is highly influenced by dualism, and so he associates the Man with the Sun - great and glorious, shining and powerful. The Woman is associated with Moon - demur and soft, reflecting the Man's glorious light.
Now, my question is this - does it feel just a little bit right to you? Doesn't it seem idyllic? Can't you picture it played out in movies and books and television shows, dramas and real life?
There is, of course, a fatal flaw with Milton's interpretation of dualism, and that is - as I've pointed out before - that Genesis 1 never divides the man from the woman. Instead, Genesis 1 divides the humans from the animals - check out the 6th day...
Now what does all this mean? Why talk about it at all?
Well, you have to wonder at the power of the mind. The world constructed between the ears becomes the real world despite evidence to the contrary. Or, it becomes the real world despite no evidence at all.
And what is most fascinating is that what we construct in our mind does become real to us. We really experience our reality.
Then of course, we have to figure out what is True and if what is True corresponds to what is real. Furthermore, we have to wonder if we can choose certain realities without being an affront to Truth - or more simply put, is the nature of Truth such that it can incorporate different realities?
Hmmm...
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/24/2004 01:58:36 PM | (0) comments
On Guard For "En Guard"
I challenge you to a duel!
I challenge YOU...
DAY challenges NIGHT...
REASON challenges FEELING...
SPIRITUAL challenges PHYSICAL...
RELIGION challenges SCIENCE...
WHITE challenges BLACK...
STRENGTH challenges FLEXIBILITY...
FACTS challenge MYTHS...
PLATONIC challenges ARISTOTELIAN...
HEAD challenges HEART...
WEST challenges EAST...
DOING challenges BEING...
SOVERIENTY challenges FREEDOM...
I challenge you. I challenge you to live bigger than dualism.
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/23/2004 10:45:52 AM | (0) comments
Three Minutes Ago...
I just don't have anytime these days - and I'm sad! Because... Well, because to process anything I need to either write about or talk about it. Writing is my preference, but that's just because people look at you funny when you talk to yourself. My downstairs neighbor probably thinks I'm looney - well, either that or I'm hiding Jews...
Anyway, I feel pulled in all kinds of directions.
First, I think I should submit a paper to The Pricilla Papers, an academic journal concerning gender issues in the church. But, I would need to actually put it together...
Second, I need to figure out what I'm doing at school. I hate it. Pray for me - really - if you have time.
Third, I still am going through ALL THE MAIL that collected while I was in the UK. I just want it to stop. Really, all I want is for all the mail to quit coming.
Fourth, I'm working more, because it's busier, because of CHRISTMAS! Please, these people plan WAY to far in advance - they're buying CALENDARS, for goodness sakes! You'll have to ask the LeyenKing about calendars in my house (for those of you who know him)...
Fifth, I am experimenting with submission. Not mutual submission, but hierachical submission. After England, I decided I really needed to give the other side (hierarchical gender relations) a chance - mostly because any doubt I had was completely blown out of the water after meeting the women and men from CBE, WATCH and Men, Women and God. So anyway, to give hierarchical roles a fair chance, I took the "submission challenge." I submitted myself to a friend who agreed to play the game with me - except it really wasn't a game. I really did it without any saftey net. He did not have to agree to release me at a later point. He did not have to agree to anything, except to accept my submission. I will have to post about it when I have time, because I learned quite a bit. But for now, let me say when he released me from my submission, I got down on my knees and cried and thanked God - really, I did. I thanked God that I could come to God and that I could be led by God and that I only needed one High Priest.
Sixth, we are continuing the experiment, except now I am in the leadership position and he is submitting to me. Soon we will try mutual submission... I will write more later.
Seventh, I feel as though I have been blacklisted by a friend - I am in pain.
Eight, I feel as though I have lost another friend - and I just want to throw my hands in the air and walk away.
Ninth, I have character flaws. I just realized that the reason I feel guilty even after I ask for forgiveness is because I ask for forgiveness for "this thing" and "that thing", but it doesn't change the fact that I'm still the kind of person who would do "this and that thing." Woe to me! I am a woman of unclean lips - can these lips be redeemed? Or do I need to cut them off?
Tenth, I am strained over the tensions of Calvinism and Armenianism - over God's soverienty and my responsibility - over immobility versus kicking down doors. There must be something higher than this tension - something in which the tension makes sense - but I know not what it is...
I'm suppose to be somewhere 3 minutes ago...
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/16/2004 11:21:59 AM | (0) comments
An Ogre In Heaven Requires It
My pastor used this phrase during his sermon this morning. It related to the sermon and made sense when he said it, but I just latched on to it because I thought it sounded like a great title for something...so I made it the title of this post. I'd think it should be the title of a list of things that the religious have believed throughout the centuries, so feel free to begin the list...I'm waiting to see what you think an Ogre in Heaven would require.
In other news, there are all these great posts y'all have written and all these thoughts you've provoked, but coupled with my trip to the UK, I feel overwhelmed and don't know where to start! It may take a little while for me to get back in the game...
For now, that's all I can coherently write.
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/12/2004 04:39:39 PM | (0) comments
A Letter
I don't often write on this subject, just because it's very delicate as well as volatile, but this letter was interesting.
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/10/2004 05:23:11 PM | (0) comments
Things That Make You Go "Hmmm..."
The following is the result of some official poll - Gallup or someone. Does this seem to implicate the people who took this poll? I find this hillarious...see if you get it.
Who is a stronger leader?
Bush Kerry
51% 35%
Who is more honest &trustworthy?
Bush Kerry
42% 37%
Who understands the average American better?
Bush Kerry
39% 43%
HA!
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/09/2004 05:43:58 PM | (0) comments
I Was Going To Tell You...
I wanted to continue my paintings of the United Kingdom for you, but alas, my mind has been thrown from the gentle driftings and contemplations to more rigorous theological discussions. If only I had computer access on those days when I still was a tourist... If I would have, I would have told you about...
1) St. Petersburg beneath the Shadows of St. Guiles - a brass quintet from Russia plays a tear jerking rendition of Amazing Grace which swells into a New Orleans jazz style celebration of the song beneath the shadows of the massive church building, St. Guiles and a few feet from the courtyard where they executed political and religious traitors. I was going to tell you about the lump that got stuck in my throat and the tears that fell from eyes. I was going to tell you about God Almighty in the midst of that carnival affair on The Royal Mile. I was going to tell you about how I looked up and saw from massive, rising stones, held together since the 10th century, a tiny green fern growing in a crack - the impossibility - and the knowing that even though this life drives upward with all determination, it cannot last for long...and the song plays..."When we've been there ten thousand years, bright shining as the sun, we've no less days to sing God's praise than when we've first begun..."
2) The Lion on the Door Knob - I was going to tell you of Belfast and the boyhood home of CS Lewis. I was going to tell you of St. Mark's, where he went to church, and how the colored signs and bulletin boards look no different than any other church's despite their famed parishioner of late. I was going to tell you of the Lion on the door knob that inspired the mind of the boy who wrote stories of "Animal Land" and how as an adult, that image of the Lion stepped off the pages and into the minds of children everywhere - Aslan, the Great. I was going to tell you of the guest book, sitting on a table in an obscure corner of a small room. I was going to tell you how "Vasso, Finland" followed "Tuscaloosa, Alabama", how Moscow came right before Tyler, Texas... of Guanacosta, Costa Rica and Toronto, Canada...of Thailand, Japan, South Korea, Bulgaria, Arkansas...I was going to tell you of another lump in my throat, more tears. I was going to tell you of a God who calls things that are not as though they were (Rom 8) and draws together a family across all barriers. I was going to tell you that the powers and principalities that divide and conquer are defeated and lay in shambles. I was going to tell you of a cross that is victorious against the splintering of humanity and how I held the proof in my own hands...how I traced the proclamation of a King and a Royal People with each name and place wrote down in that book...
I was going to tell you of silly things I did, of people I saw, of the Irishman who told me, in no uncertain terms, that "the English speak English alright, but not real English", and how I had to ask him twice to repeat it, because I couldn't understand him! I was going to tell you many things...
And, now that I think of it, perhaps I just have.
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/04/2004 06:10:22 PM | (0) comments
Before We Start, I Just Want To Say...
I'm here at the CBE Conference. It starts at 2:00 PM my time, five or six or seven hours ahead of you, depending on if you're EST, CST or MST. I don't know anyone in Alaska or Hawaii, so I'll assume no one from those two glorious states are reading.
I know I have a lot of days to catch you up on, and I will get to work soon. But I wanted to say somethings before the conference, so you, and I, would be more clear on where I stand.
Now. I just have to organize these thoughts...
Point 1 - Equality
Equality does not mean "same," so that when people say things like, "men and women are not the same," I agree. I don't agree with the typical mentality that goes along with it, which usually sounds something like this: "Men are all the same, but they are different than women, who are all the same." Even biologically, there is no universal sameness to being female, only general approximations. "Generally speaking the female body looks like this (point to diagram)," but not one female body is the same. Not one female body has the exact same mix of hormones - to be female is a general biological category that is experienced uniquely by each female. Therefore, John Eldredge, you can eat your "three desires of every woman's heart - (1) fight over me (2) rescue me (3) let me take off my clothes for you - or as he says - "reveal her beauty." Equality does not mean that persons are the same (but people are, and that's another story).
The second thing about equality is that it does not mean "Person A, who helps everyone, and Person B, who is a selfish pig, are equally valuable." Let's stay away from niceties and PC junk here. As for contributions to society or to the Kingdom or whatever, Person B is not contributing much, and we all know that. Person B is choosing to become a less valuable person. Equality does not mean we are all equally helpful.
Equality is this. Jesus paid one price - the same price - for each of us. I must mention that there is of course, the salvation "get to heaven" way of looking at this, which is true and accurate - if not the whole story. There is also the communal way of seeing this, which is also true and accurate - if not the whole story. The point here is that God paid the same price for me as he did for you, for men as he did for women.
Now the funny thing is that you will hardly find one Christian that will disagree with me here. We all know that Jesus died for you and me. The question though, is for what did he die? If it is a gift to me, what exactly is the gift?
Point 2 - Freedom
In the spirit of Scotland and William Wallace, I announce to you that "freedom is our gift, and we must take it."
A more popular way of answering the question, "Why did Jesus die?" is to say "salvation," and that is true. It is simply unfortunate that salvation has been reduced to mean: "the way to get to heaven." Salvation originally comes from the word that means "to heal" or "to be made whole" and the point here is simply that salvation frees us from those things that make us sick or broken (sin). And my friends, salvation is offered today.
I should repeat that, though. Salvation is offered today. Freedom is an offer. We have the opportunity to be free, to be whole, to be healed.
By the cross of Jesus, I have been given the opportunity to be free.
By the cross of Jesus, I am offered the opportunity to be wholly me.
And it is by the cross that I do not accept limitations placed on me that restrict me and disallow me to become fully me - particularly in the church!
I do not accept these limitations because they are an affront to the cross of Christ. I know many people try to explain my - and others - standing on this issue as "oh, she must have been hurt...she just needs some healing, just needs to know how to be female and then she'll be so happy..." Yes. I've been hurt. We've all been hurt though. And just because I've experienced the injustice, does that exclude me from talking about it? In any other situation, you would call me an expert. I've been hurt. But this hardly means that I am brainlessly responding like a wounded animal. I am one who has been hurt and then said "why am I hurt?"
It is for freedom that we've been set free. And the cost, my friends, was high.
Here is what I war against.
1) Ideological control over young girls which limits them and cloaks the freedom offered by God.
2) Ideological control over women for the same reasons as above.
3) Ideological control over men for the same reasons as above.
4) Ideological control over anyone, anywhere, anytime.
A Riddle
Ideological control is to truth as ___________ is the Christ.
Answer
The antichrist
They are polar opposites. Do you doubt me? Listen...
"You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free"
"I am the way, the truth and the life..."
Point 3 - "And so..."
There is a girl out there who is highly spiritually minded, let her be! Do not encourage her to seek a man who can guide her, let her seek God!
And there are women who are really pastoral - they should not be limited by goofy rules that say a man must be in authority. If she is the most pastoral, most spiritually wise person in a congregation, let her pastor! How hard is that?
And there are situations that require leadership and where the most godly, faith-filled person is a woman, let her lead!
And there are times in marriage and in relationships when a man (who is human after all) feels weak and discouraged, and the woman is strong, let her in strength support him!
Point 4 - Some Final Thought On The Trinity
The thing is, I am convinced that imago dei, being made in the image of God, on one level indicates that as God is one essence and three persons, humanity is one essence and many persons. I have said this before and won't drag the whole thing out again. For now, let me just get to the point (after all this, finally!)
The Trinity loves each other and values each other - not hierarchically, but equally. In other words the Father doesn't love Jesus more than the Spirit. And thus, my first point, equality is found here in the Trinity.
The Trinity do not limit each other or force each other to play roles. For example, we know that Jesus submitted to the Father when he was here, on earth. But as Philippians says, Jesus found himself in the likeness of humans and therefore submitted to God (paraphrased!). This is how Jesus behaved in that situation, but it does not limit him. It is descriptive of the way Jesus behaved then. It is not prescriptive of the way he "must" be have today. Who knows? Perhaps the Father may decide to become human, and then the Father, being found in the likeness of humanity, would submit to the Son. Or the Spirit. Or perhaps he would adjust the rules so he didn't need to submit to anyone. Who knows?
The point is, God is free and we, made in the image, are offered the opportunity to be as well.
It is for freedom that we've been set free.
And I, for one, will not spit at the gift God offers me.
And you will all just have to forgive me (or not) if I'm angry - no, furious - when someone who is older tries to rip the gift of freedom out of the hands of young girls. I mean this (God helping me) when I say that I would face death with steely determination so that the girls in my youth group could have the gift of freedom.
The gift to be fully themselves.
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/03/2004 03:37:27 AM | (0) comments
Day 5 - Sign Me Up For One Last Hurrah!
10:00 AM -
I'm going to the ocean today. I'll walk as far as I can and then catch a bus. The only thing is that I find myself walking down the Royal Mile. What's so bad about that? Nothing! It's great! It's fabulous! It's also a little crowded. See, the entire month of August is "Festival" in Edinburgh. There is an official festival which offers opera and the like. Then there's the Fringe, which is a festival for normal people - or rather, I should say abnormal people with average economic incomes. All along the Royal Mile there are shows and shops and sellers of wares...and wears. There are leaflets for...
***DANNY BHOY***
***Stand-Up Comedy So Effortless!"***
***Sold Out 2001, 2002, 2003!***
And...
***Good Godfrey!***
***2003 Female Comedian of the Year!***
And then there's the "Virgin Club." If you're under 18...well... No, if you're under 30, please skip to the following paragraph...Ok, now that I have everyone's attention! Well, the Virgin Club is a play - I suppose - and it is advertised by a Walking Penis. A really large one. That towers over everyone's head...
I accidentally ran in to it.
Ok! Here we are in the next paragraph, so let's keep moving, shall we? (NO - That was not the hurrah! I can't believe you would suggest such a thing! Now, could we please move on!?! Honestly!)
11:15 AM -
I have walked a ways and now I see buses that indicate they are headed to "Ocean Terminal." That sounds good, right? Well, the bus does go to the ocean - just one problem - you just can't get to it. The first reason is that some lunatic built a mall on the beach! For crying out loud! To mess up perfectly good beach like that! I mean!
The second reason is that the Good Queen has parked her little boat right there on the water's edge. And she is no where to be found! Imagine that, you just go and park your Carnival Cruise Line, ten-layers-with-cool-whip-and-a-cherry boat right there so that nobody can get to the water - which is what the beach is for, hello? - to get to the water! - and go off shopping or whatnot! Unreal!!
12:00 PM -
After carefully studying the map and consulting all sorts of folks, I settle on a place called "Seyton Sands." Oh! There are no buses going there today!
Rats! Foiled again!
12:30 PM -
I wander back into town (ride the bus) with all the pout of a five year old. And with the attention span of said child as well. All I need is one good distraction...and I'm on to it! Tartuns!
Actually, I don't know how to spell tartuns, if you do, humor me. If you don't, good. We can be idiots together.
And if you don't know what one is, then I'll educate you (only because I just got educated too). A "tarton" or "tartun" is a pattern. It is a fabric pattern used to signify clanship in Scotland. Apparently, each Scottish family, or clan, created a unique pattern of colors (you would likely call the patterns "flannel patterns") and would then use this pattern in clothing, scarves, blankets, etc.
My Mom's family is pretty much right off the boat. I know where they come from, and they don't come from Scotland. My Dad's family, on the otherhand... Well, let's hear what Jesus had to say about them.
"Those who are born of the Johnson family are like the wind. You knoweth not where it (they) cometh from or where it (they) goeth..." -The Gospel of John(son) 3:28
So, in all honesty, there really is some indication that some of these folks came from Scotland. Yes, I know, "Johnson" probably didn't come from Lithuania! But anyway, I'm now determined to find the Johnson Tarton. The truth is I have found two different one's, and am trying to research the correct pattern. I will have to buy my dad a scarf - except he never wears them - cause he's from Texas. I wonder if I can find a Tarton Cap....hmm... Can you see my Texas dad wearing a flannel striped cap? Sherlock Holmes?
Oh well...
Finally, there's time to sign up for one last hurrah! I'm so very excited about it! Can you guess what it is?! No? Well, you'll just have to wait until Monday the 6th because that's the day of the last hurrah!
There were many more sights today and many more fun things and much more planning, but at the end of it all, I came home and collapsed on my little air mattress. I've been editing Cini's dissertation. It covers the concept of umma (best translation: community) in Islam and how it changes or "travels" through different circumstances and cultures. In Cini's case, he studied British-Pakistani Muslims in London, Birmingham and Glasgow. Once finished, I start - and finish - one of the funniest little books I have ever read. It is called, "The Sacred Diary of Adrian Plass - Christian Speaker Age 47 1/2."
You should read it! You will laugh! You will shout! You will say...
Hurrah!!!
(the one before the last one)
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/02/2004 01:57:19 PM | (0) comments
Old World Revival
Hallelujah!! I found the INTERNET!! I've been SAVED!! There's LIFE in this blog again!! Praise the good people of St. John's College!!
And now...I'm going to go crash in my little dorm room that looks out over the river here in Durham, England. I have many things to write. I'll be back tonight.
Love to all,
And really, thank you Jesus!
Headless-in-England
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 9/02/2004 10:30:46 AM | (0) comments
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