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Day 4 - Planes, Trains And Automobiles
9:00 AM -
I am up and duly attending to journaling. Beyond this though, I am searching for a way to Ireland. This indeed, will be a day of work. Instead of going through the whole day, let me simply list the accomplishments and you will see that I have worked hard.
1) Called a Bed and Breakfast in Durham, arranged for a night's stay on September 2nd, the day before the conference.
2) Walked to Waverly Station. Walk around and around Waverly Station trying to find the entrance. Found stairs leading down. Took a number. Waited. Was called by a nice young man, who did not speak English. Well, ok, he did but I couldn't understand him. Asked nice you man to please repeat and used many words, hoping to send message "I am dumb foreigner, please speak baby talk." Finally do acquire rail ticket to and from Durham. Leave happy.
3) On walk back, buy post cards for friends. Hope I have all of my friends' addresses (if you think it is possible I do not, please email and let me know!)
4) Back to library to work on Ireland.
5) Receive email from conference folks that I am booked an extra night in hotel on September 2nd - which is when I am to be at the B&B.
6) Walk home, make phone calls, cancel B&B.
7) Walk back to library, research planes, trains and automobiles to Ireland.
8) Walk back home to Lisa and Cini to ask information questions - which of the 7 different bus lines in Edinburgh do I take to the airport? Is there more than one airport in Edinburgh? Etc...
9) Walk back over to library. Do more research.
10) Settle on "Easy Jet" - a cheap island hopper company.
11) Check hotels - settle on the Ramada Inn (oh, the dissonance!)
12) Purchase hotel room.
13) Unable to purchase flight. (YIPES!)
14) Write to the Human Puzzler to solve all my problems - "HELP! What's going on?!?!?!"
15) Human Puzzler solves all my problems - "never you mind, all is well."
And now I go to bed happy, because I am in Durham an extra day. I am in Ireland as well. And I have a really good friend (but I knew that already!).
A day of work. Every vacation has one...
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/28/2004 05:52:07 AM | (1) comments
A Brief Intermission
Stay tuned for this important information bulletin...
I only have about 15 minutes on the computer today, and will not be near one tomorrow. It is conceivable that the following day will also not lend itself to electronic journaling.
If not, don't fret. I will be back as soon as I can with more stories and antidotes - well ok, maybe not antidotes - but with stories for all!
Before I go today though, I must share one strange thing with you - my dream last night. I dreamed that I was talking to Tommy Lee Jones (who oddly enough, has ended up in my dreams a couple of times now!) and he was needing to iron his underwear. They were pink - boxers - weird - you wouldn't expect that of Tommy, now would you? But even more bizarre, he ironed them by running them through a copy machine - like a piece of paper! I remember thinking it wasn't working out too well...
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?! I need my dream tracker journal, Captain! Send immediately!
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/28/2004 05:31:10 AM | (0) comments
Day 3 - The Princess Gardens
12:30 PM -
After a slow start to the morning, I head off to the Princess Gardens - a park with carnival fringes. I say this because the park is beautiful - rolling green with splashes of color in every direction, provided by primarily roses as well as other types of flowers. This garden is overseen by the great craig on which the castle sits. It is breathtaking, this gentle green suddenly interrupted by sheer rock rising upward - probably 200 meters? And yet, on every edge of these regal gardens, there are musicians, hawkers, entertainers, vendors and even a merry-go-round. I spend the whole afternoon taking pictures. Among the scenes I tried to capture are...
1) The velvet roses
2) The children on the merry-go-round
3) The contrast of soft, emerald grass and the hard, jagged rock
4) The little girl who chased the pigeon that refused to fly
5) The medieval feel of Edinburgh's stoney skyline
5:00 PM -
I come home and eat and talk and try to figure out how to...
1) Get to Durham, England
2) Spend an extra day in Durham, England
3) Go on a "walk" or hike, as we call it, through the Scottish country side, without having to spend a lot of money on accommodations.
4) Go to Ireland
5) Go to the sea
We will see what and which one of these I embark on in days to come.
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/27/2004 06:22:07 AM | (0) comments
Day 2 - Castles, Palaces, Fish Markets And Me!
8:00 AM - (3:00 AM EST)
Up and ready to go. My hosts have work and other duties, so I am turned loose on the town without any fetters! I walk three blocks to "The Royal Mile" where all sorts of festivities are in process. One lady has gathered quite a crowd with her act. She makes and takes tea and biscuits while standing on one foot in a platform shoe. She has balanced a kettle of water on her head, the cup on one shoulder, tea on the other and a can of biscuits on the bottom of her right foot - yes that's right - the bottom of her foot. She holds her leg straight up in the air and flexes her foot, making a "table" for her biscuits. We all clap and laugh - "Good Show!"
8:45 AM -
I have made my way up to the castle. There are so many people and vendors and noise - this is Edinburgh's tourists' trap. I determine to stand still and try to see the castle without the clutter. The gatehouse rises in front of me. On the pillars to the entrance there are two figures carved into the stone. The figure on the right wears a crown and holds a sepulcher. I am later to discover this is Robert the Bruce, King of Scots. As of yet, I cannot see for all of the consummerism commencing in front of him. On the left, a strong jawed man looks out into the distance. He has fixed his gaze on something so remarkable, so powerful that it seems at any moment these stones that hold him may finally give way to the pull. I resist the urge to turn and look - to try and see what compels him. I know who this man must be, and a few steps later I am rewarded.
9:30 AM -
I have walked to the other end of the Royal Mile and now stand outside the Royal Palace. The Queen stays here when she comes. I could pay 10 dollars to go inside the grounds, but inside the palace is off-limits. Another tourist trap, I suppose. I can see the ground just find from where I stand - what is so special about the ground? On to other things...
9:40 AM -
Walking down the street, a black and white dog heads toward me. He is very intentionally going somewhere and even stops and looks both ways when coming to the intersection. No one seems to give him a second glance and I find this a little odd. Furtherback, an older gentleman with eyes down in thought, wearing a plaid jacket and pipe in hand strolls toward me. He and the dog belong to each other, I am sure of this now. I pass them and round the corner... Edinburgh has ended - and done so quite abruptly - in a green plain rising sharply after about 200 yards as a giant cliff / hill / small mountain. It is green and interspersed with rock croppings. The slope starts somewhere to my left and rises up until it juts out over the plains, which round the corner of the cliff and turn into woods. This place is called "Arthur's Seat." Legend has it that often King Arthur would come here and climb this cliff to sit and ponder, gazing out over the infant village that would someday be known as Edinburgh.
10:00 AM -
I have made my way back up Royal Mile and stop now for a bagel. While my bagel is being toasted, the lady behind the counter offers me a sandwich which she has made wrong and will throw away if I do not want it.
Stuff the chicken salad sandwich in my backpack and the bagel in my mouth - I'm off again!
10:30 AM -
As a result of feeling rather cocky about my "sharp as a tac" sense of direction, I have wandered off the Royal Mile and am now weaving my way through cobblestone streets - "Old Fishmarket Close," "Candlemakers Way," "Horse Wynd." I'm sure I know where I am. Sure. And as I am heading in the direction of home, I come across Chambers St - just like I knew I would - except it's on the opposite side than what I expected...
12:00 AM -
Time for naps and tea. When I wake up, Lisa and Cini will be home. We will make dinner and talk. I will plan for tomorrow as well.
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/26/2004 08:05:46 AM | (0) comments
Day 1 - The Shortest Night
8:45 -
Leave Newark for Edinburgh. I have eaten from a groovy little airport restaraunt called "Maui Tacos" and am happy and full. Once on the plane I am asked to give up my aisle seat (which I requested on the advice of friends a month in advance) so that a family can sit together. Note to self: Must learn to say "no." Anyway, it turns out well as I am sitting next to a nice and talkative Scottish lady who is telling me all of the sights to see in Edinburgh.
"Cheaper By The Dozen" plays on the video screens - I decide that I do not like Steve Martin. He is not really very funny - except in Three Amigos when he's on the wall trying to give bird calls to his not-so-smart compadres - "Lookuphere! Lookuphere! Heyoutwo! Lookuphere!"
10:00 -
It is dark and we are over the ocean. Occasionally I see a light in the blackness - is it a ship? An oil rig? I cannot imagine the improbability of seeing such a thing in such a wide ocean. As I think back now, I wonder if it was perhaps a star. I did not watch long enough to see if it moved, but later in the night I did realize that I could see stars if I pressed my face against the window and shut out the light with my hands...
They are serving dinner now. The stewardess says to me "Chicken or Beef." I am taking off guard and am somewhat surprised that I should be offered dinner at 10 pm. I say "chicken" I realize only later that another option was "no thanks" and so I am looking at a plate of food, when my tummy is already full with "Maui Tacos." I gallently strive to eat some of everything - finding, surprisingly, that the banana bread dessert is really very good. I am struck by the funny image of myself on the ground looking up at a plane overhead and wondering what's for dinner. The image of people eating on the plane above me makes me smile a little. Then the thought of people using the bathroom on the plane above me makes me laugh out loud. I determine not to use the bathroom on the flight.
2:30 -
They are serving breakfast. I have been dozing so I awake to the sound of the plastic tray sliding on to my tray table next to my book. I cannot eat at 2:30 in the morning.
3:00 -
The morning sun greets me and I look down on clouds. They look quilted - tiny designs and patterns repeated over and over in the white fluff. The map says I'm over Ireland. I strain to see it, but only clouds.
3:30 -
Landing! In Scotland! The passport people are nice and there is hardly a wait at all. I exchange money and follow the signs to the busses. I have been instructed to ride bus 35. I ask the driver when I get on if he could help me get off at "Chambers Street." He does not understand a word coming out of my mouth. I repeat and then he says something in return. I do not understand a word coming out of his mouth! But he waves me back, so I make my way to a seat, hoping that we have communicated and that I will find my stop!
4:15 -
The driver says something for the first time all drive, so I assume he is talking to me. I ask, "This is Chambers?" He says something again that is beyond my understanding, but I do believe I hear "Chambers" or something like it. I get off. Who knows where I am... Holy Moley! I know where I am! I'm in Edinburgh, Scotland! I am across the street from the Royal Museum! I am standing on cobblestones and old cut grey stones and all the cars are driving on the left side of the road! I'm in Scotland!
4:20 -
Cini greets me and I am taken up a flight of stairs to the flat. He insists on feeding me and making tea. We talk about everything and laugh at all the silliness of life. Soon he sends me to bed and I sleep hard and well, ready for adventures and exploring!
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/25/2004 07:21:24 AM | (0) comments
Having A Holiday!
I've made to Scotland! It's beautiful! It's wonderful! And I am greeted by good friends, cool weather and warm cups of tea...
I am also slightly jet lagged and am just waking up from an accidental nap!
There is much to say, my friends, and I love and miss you all! So I will write soon - probably tomorrow - with more information.
Until then..."I'm gone...say nice things about me..."
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/23/2004 03:11:55 PM | (0) comments
Gone To Carolina In My Mind
Actually, I've gone to merry ol' England...and Scotland, which according to legend, consumes more ale than any other country, so I guess that makes them "merry-er ol' Scotland."
Anyway, I'm taking James Taylor with me. And I'm taking you too, in my heart!
Perhaps I will be able to post while there, if not, look for photos and entries galore when I return!
Love to you all!
Oh...and...
"Here, kitty, kitty, kitty! Here, nice, big, carnivorous kitty!"
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/21/2004 06:57:10 PM | (0) comments
Header-less Horsewoman!
Ohmygosh! I've not only lost my head, I've lost my header! Where's my title? What's going on? I print one cuss word and they cut me off! It wasn't even mine! It was my sister's!
Off with HER head!
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/20/2004 03:31:17 PM | (0) comments
Grace said...
This morning as I brushed my teeth I spied a girl behind the sink.
"Who the hell are you?" I said.
She just spit and smiled.
***by Grace
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/19/2004 05:01:35 PM | (0) comments
What About Love? Don't You Want Someone To Care About You...
Love, love, love...
I can just hear Jerry Seinfield saying that.
So the Greeks were really geeked about labeling everything, and in all their wisdom, decided to categorize and label love. From what I remember, there were four types of love if you were Greek. Just so you know...they were wrong.
(Go ahead, call me arrogant, I'm use to it.)
Ice cream.
Yeah, when I talk love, baby, I talk ice cream. How's that for some Greek philosophy?
I think love is like ice cream flavors. There's a million of them, and every one of them is slightly different than the other, but they all share common features. So whether I love my friend Susy or my friend Paul or my mom, there is a commonality among all of these. Yet, at the same time, each love is particular and peculiar to the individuals involved. There will never be another love like the love I have for Susy. It is a Headless - Susy love (not that she is headless, mind you...!). There will never be another love like the love I have for Paul. Only Paul and I can have that love. Only "Tin Roof Sundae" works for my mom and I... And so it goes.
Now, you wonder how or if that relates to the Greek loves. Well, I'll tell you. I think the Greek loves are very broad categories (though still not broad enough) that are occasionally useful when you need a handle to hold on to on the journey of love, but other than that, they are at best, inadequate - at worst, stifling.
I have never been able to say, "I agape you." Or, "I phileo you 50% and eros you 50%."
Love is organic and alive. It is a living thing between people. It is a child conceived of relating and talking and walking and working, and like a child, who can say what it will be tomorrow or next year? It will laugh and it will long. It will sulk and it will play. It will not be the same in the next minute - you will wash the dishes and put up the groceries and turn around to look at it and exclaim, "Oh my! How you have grown!" And just like a child, if you try to control it or own it, you will press the life out of it and find yourself with nothing but a shell.
And this popular notion that agape love is the highest love - that love given without expectations is the highest form of love - this, I whole heartily disagree with. Agape is charity, and charity is love in a sorry situation - a situation where a person who, though he was formed in the fires of love, is unwilling or unable to grasp life and instead slowly dies under the tearful eyes of the Lover.
Love is greatest when it flows back and forth - when it finds it life in the giving and the taking - when you meet my passion with your passion. Indeed, Jesus, in his final hours, said, "I no longer call you servants, but friends."
We are called to high things.
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/09/2004 10:25:33 PM | (0) comments
This Year's Best Movie Quote...
"The world moves for love. It kneels before it in awe."
-The Village
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/08/2004 11:54:14 PM | (0) comments
One Enchilada At A Time
Previously I posted an entry entitled "Just How Deep This Rabbit Hole Goes." The scope of this post was about as broad as I would be if I move back to Texas and began eating real TexMex again (*sigh*).
Alas, short of real TexMex, I must settle for Dutch potatos (hear - potatos with no seasoning) and ham buns (for anyone outside of West Michigan, it's really simple: ham on a hamburger bun) - not so enjoyable. However, I would enjoy the opportunity to narrow the scope a bit on the "Rabbit Hole" post, so here we go!
The point of that post was simply this. We must use analogies when talking about God. We must also realize that every human attempt to describe the reality of God will inevitably fall short. This is due to the limitations of our language - which is, in turn, due to the limitations of who we are. There's more to say here, but let's fast forward.
The analogy of "falling in love" with God is not, per se, a bad analogy. However, our culture is so warped when it comes to "falling in love" - it is so laden with lies and sickness - that it becomes a dangerous analogy. Perhaps if the Church began to discuss the cultural reality of"falling in love" we might arrive at a place where (1) we could have healthier experiences "falling in love" with people and (2) we could use it as a relatively decent analogy for our experience with God. Until then, I suggest it may not be the kindest or smartest thing to do to use this analogy.
Eh tu? What do you think?
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/05/2004 04:11:54 PM | (0) comments
I Am Woman...
She is woman, hear her roar.
The Goddess has spoken,
Click here to read more.
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/05/2004 02:12:22 PM | (0) comments
Bye-Bye Smarty
They're retiring Smarty Jones.
He has bruises in his legs. Normally, horses can recover quite well from this, but he does have a $43 million dollar contract to stand stud at Three Chimneys- $43 million plus whatever he will make for each foal he produces.
So...so-long Smarty. We'll miss you and we'll always wonder...
Were you a great one?
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/04/2004 09:49:48 AM | (0) comments
Look Before Crossing
Pulling out of my street, I look to the left and see...
*"Defend America, Beat Bush!"
*"Kerry/ Edwards in 2004!"
*Hemp Goods
*Blockbuster Video
*Spirit Dreams
To my right I see...
*"Bush / Cheney 2004"
*Well-manicured lawns
Into my head, pops this song from my childhood...
"Clowns to left of me,
Jokers to the right...
Here I am - stuck in the middle with you"
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/03/2004 01:14:03 PM | (0) comments
"Just How Deep This Rabbit Hole Goes..."
JustPat had a post - Fun With Inflections - in which she commented on a Vineyard Music CD entitled "Why We Worship." Only, on the cover it apparently reads "Why We Worship Vineyard Music." So, I got a chuckle out of that - particularly because both she and I attend the same Vineyard Church...
But I've been thinking (ohmygosh!)...
What I've appreciated about Vineyard music and the "worship movement" in general, has been the turn toward addressing God with our songs. As great as the hymns are, there are not many that address God. Instead, they tend to be great works of theology set to music.
And that is a good, good thing. Seriously. It is a really good thing to sing theology. (I'm not being sarcastic!)
Music is one of God's most amazing creations, and all the wonderful attributes of music would take many, many posts to unpack. An attribute of music (and perhaps the least meaningful) is its ability to function as a mnemonic device. Therefore, singing the truths of God is a VERY positive activity for the church to engage in, and so...
Long live the hymns!
Music also is a wonderful channel of expression and conversation, and Vineyard has brought this to life for us (or revived?). Who knows? Perhaps it is the Vineyard's greatest gift to Christianity... And so...
Long live "worship songs!"
But even as I say this, I see problems. And the thing is, the root problem started long before anyone picked up a guitar or tuned an organ pipe. Somewhere along the way, Western Christianity affirmed a reality that separated our heads from our hearts. So, one arm of the church becomes more and more "intellectual" and, from their pews we hear worship songs referred to as "7-11 Songs" - you sing the same 7 lines, 11 times (snicker, snicker). While, the other arm of the church begins to despise the "frozen chosen" and there heartless pseudo-relationship with God.
And so in the end, the first group sings the great truths of God as if they were singing a funeral dirge. The other group sings (almost orgasmically) about...bubble gum.
Yes, those are the extremes and I know it. And there are many places I could go right now with this discussion. For example, we should talk more about this artificial division of head and heart. We should talk about unity in the church. We should talk about a lot of things, but I'm going to chase a peculiar rabbit for a moment.
"Oh Mi-sta' WAAA-Bit!!!"
I go to the Vineyard. I'm on the worship team. I am happy with that. Some of the lyrics, though, are not exactly on target in my opinion. Particularly, lyrics that suggest that we are "in love" with Jesus, or "madly in love with you", or what not.
It's not bad to express deep affection for God. It's not bad to look for analogies to describe the indescribable. Think about it. Here we are, fallen people in a hopeless situation, and a beautiful amazing God full of grace chooses to relate to us. How can I describe that reality?! And so we fish about for ways to talk - ways to describe our relationship with God. Inevitably the idea of "falling in love" with God comes up.
The first issue is simply the nature of analogies. They're approximations and they will fall short. So, problem number one is that many people don't seem to understand this (thus there are people out there who really believe God is male because she is referred to as "Father" - ha.)
The second (and biggest) issue though, is this: "falling in love" in our culture tends to be a really selfish, fluffy and otherwise relatively nauseating phenomena. In other words, "I'm experiencing these really intense emotions that make me feel good."
Well, yippie for you.
See, falling in love has nothing to do with the other person. Thus, there may be someone at this moment who is "in love" with me. Yet that doesn't do me a darn bit of good. I'm not experiencing their emotions. And, because above said imaginary person has yet to act loving towards me, it doesn't affect my life one bit. Furthermore, because they've not acted loving towards me, it is likely they are not in love with me, per se, but instead are in love with something in their head that they have misappropriated to the physical reality of the Headless Horsewoman.
Essentially, the reality of me, is unimportant to them.
Likewise, quite often it feels as if people who are "in love" with Jesus are, in fact, more in love with an idea that makes them feel good inside and which they have simply attached to the name "Jesus" or "God". The reality of the person of Jesus - of his moment by moment existence - is essentially ignored. Let me demonstrate.
Last Sunday, I was on the worship team. We sang a song with these words:
"Many men will drink the rain,
And turn to thank the clouds,
Many men will hear you speak,
But they will never turn around..."
I am unable to sing these words. Are they a reality? Well, it seems like it might be. But how is it loving to God to rub salt in his wounds? Do we not understand that God aches for those who are lost? And here we are, singing quite callouslly, about the many people going to hell. Is this song really a gift to God? An offering?
Or have we instead created a god that makes us feel good and then attached it to the name of Jesus? Is this song an offering to that god? Indeed Pat, "Why We Worship Vineyard Music"...
The analogy of being "in love" with Jesus carries with it the baggage of selfish, self-centered, fluffy feelings and I think they might be bleeding over into the reality of our relationship with the One Who Died.
But let me just say, for the record, I wouldn't trade my community for the world. I can sound a bit harsh at times, but my experience has been that people often need to be jarred a bit in order to wake up. My church community is wonderful. They are great people - they serve, they earnestly work towards the Kingdom, we have intense, searching discussions, thoughtful sermons and really, really good music. We might have just missed on this one.
Oh well, no gathering of the church is perfect...
And that's a wrap!
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/03/2004 09:49:38 AM | (0) comments
And I, In Wordless Wonder Wait...
Mother Teresea was once asked what she said to God when she prayed. She answered, "I don't say anything, I just listen." Upon hearing this, her interviewer, with a slightly befuddled look on his face, asked tenatively, "Well...what does God say?" She responded, "He doesn't, he just listens."
Words. They are the method by which many of us take control of our reality - particularly "word-people" like myself and many of you. It's not a bad thing - it's just a thing - a thing you can use badly or excellently, morally or immorally. As has been said before, people have morality, things do not.
Regardless, if you are a word person, you know there are times when words fail. And times when an incredible experience is ruined by your foolish attempts to capture it with words. If you are a word person, then you know the older you get, the less your words are rigid and precise when you approach mysteries. And you know the best words only hold loosely to the edges of those moments and mysteries, if you use words at all.
Have you ever listened? Without words? Have you ever known without knowing what?
Have you ever settled down in a wordless place?
But oh! How desperately we want to hear God's words! How we long for God to control us!
"The Bible is God's word." We receive prophetic words from God. "God is speaking to me." "He walks with me and talks with me..." and so on.
And yet, God seems to be pleased to wordlessly wait in a gentle breeze, a perfect blue sky, a distant roll of thunder, on the edge of my bed in the morning when I roll over and open my eyes and ponder my red walls...
I wonder...does he ponder my red walls? Wordlessly? Listening to me, while I, in wordless ponder watch? Watch the morning sun bring to life this color...
And I'm so thankful - so thankful for his wordless presence here!
I am changed.
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/02/2004 08:22:56 AM | (0) comments
Mark X's The Spot?
And I must discuss pre-destination and freedom and...something else. What was it? I can NOT remember! Oh, consternation!
I am waiting for you, my friend!
posted by Headless-in-GR @ 8/02/2004 08:17:25 AM | (0) comments
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